From New York, original humor writing & commentary by Brian Sack. Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.


CSI: Allergy Response Unit

Episode One: The unit works to snare a Brooklyn Mafia boss who has a mattress that makes him wheeze.
Episode Two: A single fingerprint leads Detectives Melsky and Duffert to a counterfeiter with four cats.
Episode Three: It’s a race against the clock as a dangerous arsonist aggravates Mrs. Peel’s asthma.
Episode Four: Detective Haggart refuses to open a 30-year old cold case because the envelope is dusty.
Episode Five: The detectives shut down a Manhattan escort service using animal dander.
Episode Six: A key witness to a brutal gangland slaying is interrogated with too much perfume.
Episode Seven: An undercover cop infiltrates a murderous drug gang only to be offered a hazelnut.
Episode Eight: Three days before he’s set to retire, Detective Williams suffers a rash. (With Terrence Trent D’Arby as a self-sabotaging dandy)
Episode Nine: Headquarters is turned upside-down as Internal Affairs investigates reports of widespread lactose intolerance.
Episode Ten: Detective Melsky separates from his wife and must come to terms with the fact his deodorant burns his armpits.
Episode Eleven: A kidnapped priest is absolutely miserable with all the pollen.
Episode Twelve: After Detective Haggart’s partner is killed on duty, the unit struggles to discover when the HEPA filter was last changed.


Defendant: Newark Airport (EWR) Count 1: Improper apostrophe resulting in the possessive. Count 2: Misspelling of a trademarked brand name which could have been easily avoided by referencing any street corner, Barnes & Noble or airport in …


Book reviews are new to this website, and certainly there are better book review sites such as Bookslut, but one can not resist the urge to talk about things when publishers start sending them to …