From New York, original humor writing & commentary by Brian Sack. Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.


Grammar Cop: Venti Trouble

Complaint: Misdemeanor misspelling of “coffee”; having error rendered permanent by creating signage out of it; affixing faulty signage to side of mobile caffeine/donut distribution vehicle. Warning issued for questionable use of mathematical symbols.
Defendant: Man selling coffee and donut for one dollar, 27th & 7th. Good price.
Report: Officer was southbound on 7th Avenue when infraction was spotted. Incident occurred near the Fashion Institute of Technology, which may explain why people who draw skirts don’t spell so good.
Fine: It is the nature of law enforcement officials to accept coffee and donuts in lieu of fines whenever possible.


THE EARLY STAGES Nobody really expects their baby to arrive on the due date, which is why the night before it's perfectly normal to go out and have many adult beverages with your friend while your …


It's 2007. The All-You-Care-To-Eat Buffet at Shoney's is overrun by a rogue band of rebels from the International House of Terrorists. With two dozen lukewarm sausages, half a tray of scrambled eggs and an unknown …