Grammar Cop: Not Particularly Intelligent Design

Defendant: Unoccupied Hyundai (driver may have experienced Rapture).
Count 1: Second degree prepositional negligence.
Count 2: Vehicular homonym.
Report: Officer Couch of the Linguistic Vice Unit spotted the vehicle in a Memphis parking lot. The officer gathered evidence in such a manner as to not arouse any suspicion. Evidence was subsequently dispatched by electronic courier where it arrived and a Hee was risen.
Fine: $310 and two points on the license, too.