From New York, original humor writing & commentary by Brian Sack. Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.


Don’t Check Out On Me, Girl

They didn’t have your Fiber One
Said the guy with the pricing gun.
We don’t got none’s what he said
All I could do was shake my head.
And when I look into your eyes
I can tell you’re not surprised
When I say they also had no milk.
I went to D’Agostino
Your advice I didn’t heed.
I went to D’Agostino
Often lack just what I need.
Took the easy route, the closest store.
Took a gamble and I lost.
Should have walked the mile to Whole Foods, girl
They’re fully stocked but twice the cost.
Give me one more chance to set things right.
Let me make it up to you.
I will find whole milk and Fiber One
If it’s the last thing that I do.
I’m putting on my shoes.
I went to D’Agostino
Your advice I didn’t heed.
I went to D’Agostino
Often lack just what I need.
Girl I’m on my knees
And have you seen my keys?
I went to D’Agostino
I went to D’Agostino
I went to D’Agostino
Girl, I’m telling you.
No Fig Newtons too.
I went to D’Agostino
Girl, I let you down.
Their lettuces are brown.
I went to D’Agostino
(Repeat/Fade Out)


This Friday I'll be officially entering the New York literary scene by participating in a reading. Readings are where writers get up and read something - so the name isn't really that misleading. The reading takes …


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