Banterist

From New York, original humor writing & commentary by Brian Sack. Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.

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Patents for a Better Tomorrow: Stop-To-Type Technology

ABSTRACT
Stop-To-Type technology disables the keyboard on your mobile phone or PDA when the device detects movement. This eliminates the dangers associated with people weaving down sidewalks as they write novellas to friends, family and business associate on their personal electronic devices.
FIELD OF THE INVENTION
This invention relates generally to mobile communications equipment and common sense. More specifically, it is an improved method of communication that helps prevent innocent individuals from having to alter their on-foot transportation trajectories as a result of another party’s inability to properly combine mobility and text communication methods.
SUMMARY OF THE INVENTION
1. The technology, once applied to all known text-capable communication devices, operates unobtrusively and automatically.
2. When device owner (forthwith: Marcus) determines that he must send an SMS or email message to his friend about nailing Doris after the Rangers game, he begins to use the device.
3. The invention determines whether Marcus is stationary (seated/standing) or mobile (walking down 6th Avenue).
4. If the invention determines that Marcus is in fact walking down 6th Avenue, it disables the keyboard. This prohibits Marcus from walking as he types his message about nailing Doris last night after the Rangers game. (Fig. A)
5. By disabling Marcus’s ability to walk and type a message about nailing Doris last night after the Rangers game, the invention allows Marcus to focus on his personal speed and trajectory. This should help prevent Marcus from careening into me and my $2.28 Starbucks venti coffee.
6. If the invention determines that Marcus is in fact stationary, the keyboard is then enabled, allowing Marcus to type his message about nailing Doris after the Rangers game. (Fig. B)
CLAIMS
What is claimed as invention is the technology that overrides the apparent inability of electronics-bearing pedestrians to perform two simultaneous functions.
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