From New York, original humor & commentary by Brian Sack.
Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.


Peanut Hysteria Zone

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Fear the legume! [PDF]



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Even though two of my children have life-threatening peanut allergies, I giggled at this.

Does that make me a bad parent?

[ No, it makes you a rational parent. The best kind! -B. ]

I was reprimanded for sending my daughter to school with a fluffernutter sandwich. Remember those? YUM.

I was going to comment about my sons' preschool and how the only snacks remaining after taking allergies into consideration are goldfish and cheese sticks, but after reading your comment disclaimer, I'm all nervous. Will I be approved? How will I know? When will I know? And most importantly, is my apostrophe correct? The pressure is just too much. I rescind my comment.

During these fearful years - I am not above hiding jars of chunky and creamy in my attic; now the Anne Frank of sandwich fixins.

Do let us know - by coded blog entry - when the coast is clear.

That is to say, "creamy."

At a school my daughter used to attend, it was verboden to send any product that "obviously" had nuts in them.

Please all send me the schools your children go to so I can send a child with a loaded gun, don't worry, it is quite funny when it goes off!

[ Peanuts are the same as guns, everybody. -B. ]

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From New York, where English is sometimes spoken.



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