Banterist

From New York, original humor writing & commentary by Brian Sack. Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.

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The Headline That Wasn’t – 05.07.2010

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For many years I’ve thought that coming up with headlines for the NY Post was one of the greatest jobs in the world. To be paid for puns is lovely. I haven’t been paid for puns since I stopped working on billboard advertising. Most puns are godawful: Hail Caesar and five other new salads is a good example of a pun you should be put to the sword for.
Occasionally the Post comes up with something brilliant. And to be paid for puns that half the city gets to see. That’d be a sweet gig. Anyway, it occurred to me that I have Photoshop and know how to use it well enough that I too can come up with NY Post headlines whenever I want. Though the pay is crap and I don’t have their circulation.


Previously

I pay the PhoneTag company $10 a month for their service which transcribes voicemail messages and emails them to me. This comes in really handy as I can look up messages for reference, keep a …

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Boy howdy. I was chosen for another Review of the Day listing on Yelp, this time for a review of Perilla. Damn fine restaurant. This doesn't pay a damn thing of course, but I figure with …