From New York, a weblog of original humor by Brian Sack.
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Entries from Banterist tagged with "Hardship"

"It Was Twenty Years Ago Today"

In 2005 my wife dragged me, kicking and screaming, to China. I did not want to go because I had a picture in my head that I was quite comfortable with and didn't feel like challenging it. But, since my wife is almost invariably right it turned out to be one of the most amazing trips of my life. I still talk about the asparagus. Best asparagus ever. No doubt it was farmed in melamine-tainted soil with carcinogenic fertilizers - but it was truly delicious.

Continue reading... ""It Was Twenty Years Ago Today""


©Brian Sack | Filed under: History | 5 Comments
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Understanding Your Cable Bill

DVR Service Rental Fee This is the charge for the Scientific Atlanta Digital Video Recorder that crashes every 3-6 months and erases all your programs.

Continue reading... "Understanding Your Cable Bill"


©Brian Sack | Filed under: Television | 2 Comments
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Don't Check Out On Me, Girl

Lyrics lacking melody due to absence of musical talent.

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©Brian Sack | Filed under: All Lyrics, No Melody | 2 Comments
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I Touched Kevin Federline, and He Touched Me

In Saving Private Ryan, Spielberg brilliantly conveys the terror the soldiers felt as their landing craft approached the Normandy coast. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say that's exactly how I felt when I realized I would soon be deposited on the shores of Federline Beach to storm the bunkers of his mind.

Continue reading... "I Touched Kevin Federline, and He Touched Me"


©Brian Sack | Filed under: People | 22 Comments
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My First Sober Concert

The Wiggles consist of four men: Jeff, Murray, Greg and Anthony. They each have a color and a shtick: Jeff wears purple and is narcoleptic. Murray wears red and plays guitar. Greg wears yellow and likes to do magic tricks, like a non-gay David Copperfield. Anthony wears blue and overeats healthy things.

Continue reading... "My First Sober Concert"


©Brian Sack | Filed under: Fatherhood Dispatch | 8 Comments
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Reparations For The Awkwardly Surnamed

Every Ho and Fuykschot is well aware they're the source of entertainment at roll call. There's not a Dickgraber or Dumfart who hasn't been hung up on at least once.

Continue reading... "Reparations For The Awkwardly Surnamed"


©Brian Sack | Filed under: Thoughts
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