Defendant: Allstate Towing, NYC
Count 1: Failure to properly contract “you are” in the creation of a smug window decal.
Count 2: Rendering error adhesive so as to make it semi-permanent.
Count 3: Exposing general public to power trip-based smugness and grammatical indecency while relocating their vehicles.
Report: Officer spotted the vehicle and placed a call to nearby fellow officer, whose window and zoom lens offered the best opportunity for documenting the crime. Lack of a polarizing lens prevents you from seeing the man in the driver’s seat. Just as well, as he was visibly over-Whoppered.
Fine: $130 and a Get Out Of Pound free card.
Brian Sack
I started Banterist in 2003 after this conversation with my cat. It led to all sorts of good things.
Thank heaven that my world doesn’t include those hideous red and yellow stripes on anything.
Does the Grammar P.D. have a Statistics Abuse Division ? There’s no shortage of dubious action in the numbers racket.
There’s a typo in this post. Count 2 is written, “… to as to make it…” It should read, “…so as to make it…”
[ I should stop letting Ecuadorians proofread my posts, but they’re so much cheaper. -B. ]
Wow, the driver took that day off from the trailer park? How special.
The offending car owner could just order that tow truck off his premiseses!