Defendant: Organic Dry Cleaning, Seventh Ave.
Count 1: Misdemeanor spelling.
Count 2: Display of said error in a high-traffic public venue.
Description: Officer Oyo of the Chelsea Grammatical Vice Squad witnessed the infraction, noting an increase in such incidents in the area. Despite the potential advantages of environmentally conscious dry-cleaning, contribution to the area’s grammatical decay must be addressed lest it hinder the area’s slow gentrification. Defendant is also advised to reconsider “[we] use organic fluid to clean your clothes” as a selling point, as most potential customers spend their time on the sidewalk avoiding organic fluids.
Fine: $85 neatly pressed, hung on tiny hangers, and individually encased in totally non-environmentally-friendly plastic.