Banterist

From New York, original humor writing & commentary by Brian Sack. Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.

Menu

Grammar Cop: Lettuce Get Something Straight

salads.jpg
Complaint: Illegal use of an apostrophe, a misdemeanor which suggests that Summer Salad possesses some whole wheat pizza that is low in carbohydrates.
Defendant: Rocco’s, a specialist in the creation and distribution of sauce-covered bread discs.
Report: Officer was recently re-deputized after being re-equipped with a Casio Exilim digital camera similar to the Casio Exilim digital camera he lost two months ago. Officer witnessed the sign loitering at the establishment entrance. Sign did not attempt to flee, and in fact was very cooperative.
Fine: $75, or 75 carbs.


Previously

CANADA Simon: I don't mean to be rude, but: boring. Boring. Really. You look good. You're probably nice. But greatest country in the world? No, definitely not. Sorry. Paula: I've always liked you, Canada. Don't listen to …

Next

From: Mayor Bloomberg To: New York Re: Operation Sh As you know, our city enjoys one of the lowest crime rates for a city of its size. For that, we owe our fine police department our great thanks …