The story of the pants heard ’round the world.
An original piece commissioned by The Independent (UK). Humorous parts removed to satisfy space issues.
Until recently, the idea of a card for your mother’s new boyfriend’s birthday or celebrating your friend’s divorce might have been considered outrageous, ridiculous, absurd. Not any more.
THE BARE MIDRIFF
If the midriff hangs over the top of the pants, consider not exposing it until that doesn’t happen any more. Because of egregious abuse, it is illegal to expose the midriff in Holyhead. The midriff is a privilege and not a right.
Ashton wheels his beloved anywhere she wants to go without complaint, which would be pointless because her hearing went a few years ago. When they kiss, there is an electricity in the air, caused in part by Demi’s polyester gown.
Commissioned by London’s daily newspaper, The Independent.
Politics, over easy.
Excerpts from the ongoing interrogation of Saddam Hussein. One of the most popular McSweeney’s pieces.