From New York, a weblog of original humor by Brian Sack.
Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.

New York

Dan Smith Will Teach You Edelweiss

The ubiquitous Dan Smith poster.Read on...

Crazy Old Lady Industries - First Quarter Report

I'm thrilled to say that the top-line results for 1Q 2007 are quite promising, and we're on target to have a banner year thanks to New York City's demand for batshit-crazy old ladies.Read on...

Why Are You Shouting?

Read on...

All Hail The New York Transit Worker

'Twas five days before Christmas and all through the town; Not a train was up running, they'd all been shut down...Read on...

Superficial Voter's Guide - NYC 2005

A non-partisan guide for judgemental New York voters.Read on...

Johnny Berlin

Please come see Johnny Berlin, a refreshing documentary directed by Dominic DeJoseph, executive produced by Michael Stipe and Jim McKay, and produced by Ted Green and Brian Sack.Read on...

My Mayor Makes The City Safe

When random, politically correct violations of the Fourth Amendment aren't enough.Read on...

Welcome to the MTA Subway Store!

Introducing the Orwell XL Transparent Backpack, for New York's busy subway commuters.Read on...

Report to Shareholders

I am pleased to report a banner year for Standing Outside The 14th Street Chase Bank Holding The Door For People Industries.Read on...

Travis Bickle On Broadway

How our taxi driver made Saturday night memorable.Read on...

The Platinum MetroCard

With the Platinum MetroCard you'll not only enjoy all the traditional benefits standard MetroCard holders enjoy, you'll enjoy unprecedented class and service - the subway is your oyster.Read on...

Dear Lady Squatting In Our Midst

Our time together was brief, but somehow it seemed like an eternity. Perhaps because the image will be with us long after the earth is swallowed by a supernova. Read on...

The Mayor Introduces Operation Sh

In which the Mayor of New York tackles a new enemy, and asks if you wouldn't mind turning that down a little.Read on...

News For Pigeons

All the fair and balanced news that's fit to print, for pigeons.Read on...

Hey New York, Recycling's Back!

What can and can't be recycled.Read on...

Dear Mayor: Smoking Mad

A patron is shocked by organized resistance.Read on...

Neckface Franchise Available

An exciting ground floor opportunity.Read on...

How New York Is

Answering the question.Read on...

ABCs of the MTA

The Metropolitan Transit Authority explained on a third-grade level.Read on...

Ask Banterist: Taxing Question

Dear Banterist, I am still a relatively new member of the New York community. There is something which puzzles me,...Read on...

Dear Cyclist Whom I Will Be Beating

I am not certain of the circumstances that will lead to you, the cyclist, being beaten by me, the pedestrian,...Read on...

Uses for 311

311 is New York City's New Phone Number for Government Information and Services. Among the many services accessible through 311, you can...Read on...

Kitchen No Longer Confidential

Prior to meeting and marrying my wife, my method for eating out involved simply exiting the house and looking for...Read on...

New York Sidewalk Trivia

Did you know the average time it takes any stationary object to be sprayed with dog urine is nine minutes?Read on...