From New York, original humor & commentary by Brian Sack.
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Google Presents An Exciting Business Opportunity

My wife and I had been talking for a long time about a start-up business. We'd been looking for something challenging and rewarding. As you can imagine, when this well-targeted Google ad popped up it was a eureka moment for both of us:

labor camp.jpg

Labor camps! Of course! Why didn't we think of that? So much better than ostrich farms or retailing on eBay.

I know from having read Anne Applebaum's Gulag that labor camps can be immensely profitable - the Soviet Union relied on them. And part of China's great economic success stems from the low-cost labor often associated with mass involuntary servitude.

As the ads contend, China is the world's supplier of all your labor camp needs. North Korea too, I suppose, but they're not really big on the Internet just yet.

labor camp 2.jpg

We immediately sketched out our plan for a small, manageable labor camp. Nothing too fancy as we could always expand later. We secured a small parcel of land in upstate New York (a bargain because it was clay soil next to a mosquito-infested swamp). Taxes are minimal.

As the ad promised, we got a better deal on a bulk labor camp. It arrived in 3,221 separate shipments. Granted, most of our spring was exhausting as we spent it installing fence posts, latrines and razor wire. But - I'm happy to say we're now in business and looking forward to the adventure that is entrepreneurship.


©Brian Sack | Filed under: Marketing | 3 Comments | Email to a Friend
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Comments

So, what is your going rate for two labor units with some experience in lawn care maintenance?

Also, would I be responsible for providing food and water during their workday? How about transportation too and from the labor camp? If I have to provide these things, I would expect a hefty discount.

Thanks!

(Un)True Testimonial: "Luckily, the UN is slow on enforcing most Geneva Conventions, so I was able to get my 'Little Labor Camp for Kids' (tm) up and running in no time flat making lead and melamine toys. We love our 'Little Labor Camp' and would easily get another."

Labor camp? Yes, I have heard they are all the rage in Communist countries and quite successful! Kudos to you and your wife for being the 1st to bring them here to the U.S. and giving them a Capitalist upgrade! I'm certain China and Russia will want to send people over to model your camp within a year! :-)

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