From New York, original humor & commentary by Brian Sack.
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Hair Club For Mensa

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Why Hair Club for Mensa?

Hair Club for Mensa can help you feel better about your appearance as well as let everyone know how smart you are - thus tackling two crushing insecurities at once.


How do I qualify?

To qualify for Hair Club for Mensa you must score in the top two percent of the general population on a properly administered IQ test. And you must be balding.


When should I contact Hair Club for Mensa?

As you know - because you're so very intelligent - the average human head has 100,000 hairs on the scalp. Hair loss becomes noticeable after you've lost about 50% of your hair. Therefore, using simple division you no doubt understood as a toddler, you should call us when you have about 50,000 hairs left.


Why am I balding?

The proper question is, "What are the reasons I am facing Androgenetic Alopecia?" and the simple answer is genetics and aging. The more complex answer is in the 812-page scientific study laden with big words which you'll receive after joining Hair Club for Mensa. Leave it on your coffee table to impress a woman, should one visit.


©Brian Sack | Filed under: Satire | 3 Comments | Email to a Friend
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Comments

Once again, you perpetuate the myth of the genius as a romantic misfit.

Once and for all - chicks dig men flashing a huge intellect. As anyone with a 9" forebrain can tell you.

reminds me of this girl; botox + makeup+ breast, lips and nose job not to mention the wig ....

i want stop to my hair loss

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Not for everyone, but hopefully for you.



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