Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.
Grammar Cop: All Talk, No Mastication
Defendant: KGO AM 710, San Francisco
Count 1: Negligent hyphenation.
Report: Officer Frank of the Bay Area Grammatical Vice Squad initially spotted the infraction on a billboard alongside US 101 but was unable to capture the evidence and maintain 65/mph. Fortunately the defendant also advertises on buses, one of which later appeared next to Officer Frank's camera-equipped patrol vehicle.
Fine: $130, and KGO personality Bret Burkhart will make public the name of his hairstylist so that he/she can be avoided.
Trackback
You can ping this entry by using:
http://www.banterist.com/movabletype/mt-tb.cgi/357
Ambrose Bierce may have linked to us.
Entries:
- Closet Testimonials - Julie
- Grammar Cop: Go Speed Eraser, Go!
- Closet Testimonials - Mike
- F.A.Q.: Why Is Your Playground On Top Of A Cemetery?
- Script from the beginning & end of my soap opera career
- Free Estimates
- Welcome, First-Timers.
- Radio Interview Tips
- Real and Virtual Appearances
- Book Report: Launch Day
Comments:
- Angie B. on Grammar Cop: Go Speed Eraser, Go!
- Brad Zimmerman on Grammar Cop: Go Speed Eraser, Go!
- Terry Pankhurst on The Cons of November
- Linda Chamberlain on Tiffany & Co. Glass Apple My Father Didn't Want
- ScreamingPepper on F.A.Q.: Why Is Your Playground On Top Of A Cemetery?
- Heather on Closet Testimonials - Mike
- Josh on Grammar Cop: Go Speed Eraser, Go!
By category:
- *Greatest Hits* (54)
- A Thousand Words (13)
- All Lyrics, No Melody (1)
- Articles (19)
- Ask Banterist (3)
- Banterist (29)
- Breakroom (4)
- Eavesdropping (3)
- eBay (17)
- Eyewitness (10)
- Fatherhood Dispatch (11)
- Foreign Desk (23)
- Friends (3)
- Games (6)
- Grammar Cop (94)
- Greeting Cards (1)
- History (9)
- In The News (39)
- Interactive (5)
- Internet (24)
- Johnny Berlin (6)
- Letters (20)
- Marketing (21)
- McSweeney's (5)
- Miscellany (6)
- Monologues (4)
- New York (24)
- Noble Experiments (10)
- Others (8)
- Parody (10)
- People (15)
- Photos (2)
- Playmobil (6)
- Politics (30)
- Profiles (2)
- Radar (5)
- Rants (10)
- Reviews (5)
- Satire (101)
- Spying (4)
- Television (11)
- The Independent (9)
- Thoughts (23)
- Travel (54)
- Work (65)
Banterist is licensed under a Creative Commons License and is powered by Movable Type 3.33. The site is pretty because Nick Aster made it that way.
© 2003-2008 Brian Sack. All rights reserved.
Where've
we been?
NPR • The
Guardian • USA
Today • Boing Boing • Daybreak USA • Fusion • New York
Daily News • Canada National Post • KIRO • Radar • McSweeney's • The
Independent • Glamour • MSNBC.com • FARK • Glenn Beck program • New York
Post Page Six • BBC Radio • Gawker • Defamer
• CNN.com • Cracked • New
Zealand Herald • Irish
Independent • Weekend America and other fine media outlets.
Subscribe to Feed
Comments
Is "hairstylist" the appropriate name for someone who would coiff a toupee? That hairline looks a little too straight to be real...
Posted by: Grant Walters | May 15, 2006 6:44 PM
Solid, dependable toothless radio. That really describes most stations, now doesn't it?
Posted by: eggsngrits![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.banterist.com/nav-commenters.gif)
|
May 15, 2006 9:14 PM
I'd go so far as to argue that the closing full-stop is (if you'll pardon the pun) rather pointless, as there's nothing resembling an actual sentence preceding it.
Posted by: GreyDuck | May 16, 2006 2:05 AM
During a trawl trying to work out why soundbyte, sound-byte, sound byte, soundbite and sound-bite are regularly interchanged on the net (and in real life), I found the following list of v. funny language bloopers from around the globe to cheer up those who miss Brian's photos of dodgy signs from China.
http://www.wordnet.com/bloopers.html
Posted by: Jody | May 16, 2006 6:53 AM
Three cheers for KGO! Who wants unsound bite-free radio? It may end up biting anyway, by ACCIDENT.
I for one am emboldened to listen to this station based on their claim. Especially in a world where most radio stations BITE by default. Especially talk radio. Especially talk radio screamers who try to take their "right-wing party animal" act to CNN Headline News television and kidnap/brainwash brilliant but unsuspecting humorists for their own NEFARIOUS AND DIABOLICAL SCHEMES! This aggression will not stand, man.
FREE BRIAN!!!
Posted by: Corry Lee Smith | May 16, 2006 2:10 PM
Dear Brian,
Listen, I think I might have been misspoken in my previous message. What I meant to say is:
Do you think Erica Hill would go out with me?
That's all I really wanted to say. Sorry for the misunderstanding. You know I'm behind you 110%, buddy.
yer pal,
Corry
P.S. Mr. Beck, about those goons who just showed up at my door and beat the crap out of me: They were very professional, left no permanent damage, just a few marks, and I still hurt like hell. They even left a card and contact information. Said they were a local Homeland Security contractor startup biz here in Huntsalulu. My compliments and best of luck in the future.
Posted by: Unclaimed Mysteries | May 16, 2006 2:40 PM
Thank you, thank you. A cousin of Nancy Reagan's anti-child abuse program!
Posted by: Bill Walsh | June 1, 2006 10:32 PM
Why type 65/mph? It is not a fraction, nor a comparison.
What would be wrong with 65mph?
Cleaner; save a keystroke; more sensible.
RB
Posted by: RB | July 25, 2007 11:57 AM