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Grammar Cop: Coney Island Crime Spree

coney1.jpg

Count 1: Usage of an apostrophe in the construction of a plural noun.
Count 2: Rendering grammatical mischief permanent.
Count 3: Public display of grammatical negligence.


coney2.jpg

Counts 1&2: Usage of an apostrophe in the construction of a plural noun.
Count 3: Unwarranted hyphenation.
Count 4: Rendering grammatical mischief permanent.
Count 5: Public display of grammatical negligence.

Note: The squiggle over the "N" is not under U.S. jurisdiction.


coney3.jpg

Count 1: Negligent spelling of "Daiquiri."
Count 2: Usage of an apostrophe in the construction of a non-existent plural noun.
Count 3: Failure to correctly spell the cornerstone of your business.
Count 4: Rendering grammatical mischief permanent.
Count 5: Public display of grammatical negligence.

Note: The squiggle over the "N" is not under U.S. jurisdiction.


coney4.jpg

Count 1: Negligent spelling of "Racing."
Count 2: Failure to spell 50% of the business name correctly.
Count 3: Rendering grammatical mischief permanent.
Count 4: Public display of grammatical negligence.


coney5.jpg

Count 1: Unwarranted apostrophe usage.
Count 2: Rendering grammatical mischief permanent.
Count 3: Public display of grammatical negligence.
Count 4: Failure to notice correct spelling over the three baskets in the back.


coney6.jpg

Count 1: Usage of an apostrophe in the construction of a plural noun.
Count 2: Rendering grammatical mischief permanent.
Count 3: Public display of grammatical negligence.


Defendant: Multiple defendants, oddly all located within dart-throwing distance from each other in Coney Island - which is not an island.

Report: Officer and partners were surrounded by grammatical mischief, drunks, and questionable midriffs. Crimes were recorded. Rather than investigate further, officer chose to eat hot dogs and play Shoot The Freak as it was hot and life is short.

Fine: Lifetime supply of daiquiris, Nathan's hot dogs and stuffed animals.


©Brian Sack | Filed under: Grammar Cop | 33 Comments | Email to a Friend
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Comments

ah...welcome back Grammar Cop!

I think the third one should be given special dispensation. After all, they give free refills.

Maybe time for a competition -- the business with the most atrocious misuse of an apostrophe wins a copy of "Eats, Shoots and Leaves" (http://tinyurl.com/8adfm) and membership of the Apostrophe Protection Society (http://www.apostrophe.fsnet.co.uk/)

Don't you know that an apostrophe means HERE COMES AN 'S' !!!

I love the one up in Harlem that has 'shrimps' for sale. Disclaimer: I am black, so this is not a racist comment.

The first accusation (with the NO PARKING sign) also should be "No Parking at Any Time" instead of "No Parking at Anytime"

Right on, Grammar cop! Our vigilance is eternal!

(But I have to admit even I am shocked to learn of the existence of the Apostrophe Protection Society.)

Great site! One of my pet peeves: incorrect usage of a decimal point in conjunction with the ¢ symbol. For example:
Extra espresso shot.....Add .50¢

It's very common, and it drives me nutty. Is there a collection of these transgressions somewhere on the web?

This page should carry some kind of warning, it's not for the faint of heart. I was shuddering.

Well, violators won't be towed. Violators' cars will be towed, so I assume you are just concerned about 1 character apostrophe offset. Also you neglected to note the space that should be in "Any Time".

You know, I have to admit I was a little skeptical of the "incorrectness" of "dacquari".

Yes, I realize that it's not the commonly-accepted spelling, but it's also not, to my knowledge, a regional spelling, as I had originally assumed upon seeing the above sign. (Though I have seen it spelled in such a fashion on many, many different signs in that part of the world).

Perhaps you can do some research and report back?

Help is on the way! A new art project is bring back what was fading away.

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/06/17/arts/design/17cone.html?hp

Maybe that second place is actually run by a couple of guys named Pina-Colada and Strawberry Daiquiri, and they just decided to name their eatery after themsleves, like how Emeril Lagasse calls his place "Emeril's". Did ya' think of that, smarty-pants? Huh? Did ya'?

On the blackness of kettles:

"Rather than investigate further, officer
chose to eat hot dogs and play Shoot The Freak
as it was hot and life is short."

Write yourself a ticket, right now!

[ For what? -B.]

At least the folks in the third picture did not say, "Refills for free"...
The "for free" usage has become ubiquitous...

OK, this is truly horrible. But the worst one I ever saw was (in a cake shop window) "Gateau'x". Yes really.

these annoy me as much as anybody but it just occurred to me what a brilliant piece of marketing it is. how much more often does a sign get noticed due to misspelling or grammar errors, particularly in the case of "raceing" and "immigration?" no one would notice if a sign was spelled correctly but misspell it and it sticks out. just a thought.

one of my favorites is "your welcome" as if you possess welcome.

Just wait a few years, and watch all of these signs change over to Russian. That's the way Coney Island is headed.

[ But will they spell things correctly or nyet? -B. ]

New Jersey Department of Transportation official motto: People That Care

Let's not mention that "Transport" is a perfectly good noun as it is, without the "ation." The person that wrote that sign is not someone that cares that much about that language that we call English.

The "squiggle over the N" is called a tilde.

[ Yes, but it lacks comedic capital. -B.]

Oh, it hurts. Someone make the stupid stop. Please.

Those poor, poor apostrophes.

I am counsel for Mr. Dacquari and we are demanding that you cease and desist in your attacks on his fine establishment.

My love, for this site' ... is deep: I thank you!!!!! more more more more "please"

I bow down to you.

I have done this exact same thing:

http://www.livejournal.com/users/lilrongal/212822.html

Grammar Cop himself split an infinitive in saying "to correctly spell" in the Pina Colada/Daquari item. [Infinitives are not to be split because they can't be split in the one-word infinitives of the root languages of English. So I learned in grade school.]

Other pet peeves--ending sentences in prepositions and use of "their" for him/her in the singular. My teachers knew their English, but today's teachers evidently do not, and few teach respect for their native language. Just listen--the evidence is all around us.

[ D'oh. -B. ]

Equally offensive in the first photo was the expression "At Anytime [sic]", which should have read "at any time".

So far nobody has commented on the advertised specialties of the towing company in the first photo. "Fast Towing & Collisions"? That implies that perhaps the property owner has a choice to make when calling about an illegally parked car -- "Hello, ACME Towing Company? Yes, I have an illegally parked car in front of my establishment. No, I don't want them towed. Could you just come over and bash them up a bit? And please hurry!" :-)

I have oft wondered if NYC public schools are teaching the apostophe abuse. It is a rampant problem amongst the natives.

I am still trying to figure out the message from devil_advo back in June (see above.) What's wrong with "immigration"?

Sophist,

If the one venue were jointly owned by both Pina-Colada and Strawberry Daiquiri, it should read:
Pina-Colada and Strawberry Daiquiri's.

Jack and Jill's children = children that Jack and Jill have together.

Jack's and Jill's children = Jack's children and Jill's children.

Yall need to post more pics i need them for a project!!

how do you spell badunkadunk? where exactly does the hyphen go?

I need some very creative ideas that will loosen up the atmosphere as my students are very serious. Any word games or writing games are appreciated!.

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