A is for Audible, which most announcements are not.
B is for the Batteries, which for a dollar can be bought.

C is for the Chivalry the elderly must miss.
D is for Dirty, as in stairwell filled with piss.

E is for Express train, to get you on your way.
F is for Fifteen, as in minutes of delay.

G is for the Green light the conductor's waiting for.
H is for Held up, because some schmuck's half in the door.

I is for the Indigent's rehearsed pleas for some cash.
J is for the Jumbo lady's three-seat-taking ass.

K is for the Kids who think it's fun to surf the trains.
L is for the Lousy job of gathering their remains.

M is for the Metrocard, of which I have a ton.
N is for Not knowing how much money's on each one.

O is for the Odor you can't escape when cars are packed.
P is for the Posters read so eyes don't make contact.

Q is for the Quest to find the one car that has seats.
R is for Re-routing trains to stops on other streets.

S as in Stand-clear-the-doors, the mantra that they chant.
T is for Times Square Station: avoid, unless you can't.

U for Union workers manning booths that needed closing.
V for all the Vitriol they spewed just for proposing.

W for the Wanderers who travel car to car en masse.
X is for X-rated comments scratched into the glass.

Y for 'Your attention please'; precursor to bad news.
Z for Zonked-out drug addict; missing several teeth, and shoes.